Tuesday, April 10, 2007
this life in my pocket: issue 19: your sucking my life.. slimeball. get away!
i've been feeling really good lately. life is good. love is good. you are good. i am good. oh, goody! no but really, i have. like really strong and really confident and proud of myself... just stella.
i was coming back, coming back strong and beautifully. it was at its peak now. i thought we could sit and rest there for a while..
we tipped, and we go back down the hill. i'm gone. people start weighing me down, and putting me down. whining in my ears, "if you hadn't done it in the first place..", being so.. blasted pounding. screwed in a vice. i feel so shoved down by them. ground into the dirt, where before, before i was soaring ever higher.
i was feeling so empowered, filled with good energy. but now its.. zapped. poof. byebye.
i wish i could go back. i'm suffocating in the dingy, sleazy, screwy air filling my lungs. i want to go away, anywhere away.. just to feel that again. i need to get away. i need to be myself again.
i need me.